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How to Pray: Confusing Questions to Authentic Conversations

how to pray

HOW TO PRAY: CONFUSING QUESTIONS TO AUTHENTIC CONVERSATIONS

I don’t really know the first time I heard about prayers, maybe in a movie. It definitely wasn’t in a church because I hadn’t stepped into a church for an actual service until I was 24 years old. Even though I hadn’t given my life to Christ I still found myself praying, talking to God. I think.

I started praying a lot more in college. I had reached a point where my curiosity took over. My lack of fulfillment was overwhelming even though I found myself somewhat successful in school, athletics, and even within my friend groups. It’s funny I heard someone recently deem us young adults and millennials as the lost generation. I thought, “Great! Being lost turned out to be the perfect place for Jesus to find me!”

I would sit there in my dorm room and have conversation sometimes with what seemed like myself. Was I praying? Should I kneel? Should I put my hands together? I think I’ve seen other people do that.

When I first started praying I had no idea what to talk about. Do I talk about my day? Do I ask him questions? Do I ask God for what I want to receive in my life? Do I thank God for the blessings that He’s given me? Do I pray for my family‘s safety?

And even if the answer is yes to all of those questions, where do I start? What’s the right order that I’m supposed to do this in? Is there specific language that I’m supposed to use? What the heck does “amen” even mean?

Honest, these were thoughts I had and I’m assuming I’m not alone. By no means at all am I an expert in praying now, but I have come to learn and believe that prayer isn’t something to nervous about or perfected. Prayer is authentic, individualized, and unique to the relationship that you have with God.

 

HOW DO I PRAY?

Just start talking, or in my case writing. When I pray out loud or in my head I more often than not lose track of what I was about to say and start thinking about something completely different like my to-do list or what I was planning on eating for breakfast, and whatnot.

I have prayer ADD.

Because of that each and every day I journal, and every journal I own has a different topic. I have a journal that is filled with inspiration for work. I have a journal that expresses how grateful I am for every aspect in my life. And I also have a journal that I call “My Letters to God”. This journal was created because I suck something awful at praying in my head.

For myself, writing my prayers down has helped organize my thoughts, my fears, my aspirations, my hopes, and ultimately my conversation with God. My prayers are authentic, simple, the least fancy, probably all wrong, but… they’re my letters to God.

While I still pray out loud and in my head throughout the day to ask God to guide me or to thank Him. The Big Guy loves the conversation I’ve been told, and it doesn’t matter if it’s directly spoken or written in a letter.

 

WHO DO I PRAY TO?

One big question I had was who do I pray to? God? Jesus? The Holy Spirit? The answer and advice that I got was this. All the above depending on the situation and what was on your heart. After all, they are one in the same.

I usually pray, speak, or write to God while visualizing Jesus standing behind me with his hand placed on my shoulder. Why? Because while I’m visualizing Him there I can sense He is with me more than ever and a wave of peace and comfort seems to cover me. I get goosebumps most of the time I pray, and especially because I have started to visualize His presence.

 

WHAT DO I DO WHEN I PRAY?

If you’re like me most of the time your thoughts run ragged and you write your prayers down. But when my hands aren’t busy writing my prayers down I usually sit with my palms facing up while my head is dropped down. I do this because to me it’s a sign of acceptance and surrender.

It’s me physically receiving His grace, mercy, and forgiveness while also surrendering my life to God.

 

PRAYER IS PERSONAL

I can’t stress this enough. Prayer should be personal, not perfect. For so long I struggled with not doing it “right”. Throughout my journey to learn about praying, speaking to pastors, mentors, and friends, the number 1 rule to praying is to bring your whole self to God, 100% authentic, the person He created you to be.

Does that look like writing down your prayers, speaking them in a whisper, having the conversation internally? Does it look like kneeling, sitting, standing, palms up, hands together? My answer, it looks like anything and everything you want it to look like, and whenever and wherever you need it.

“Prayer is primal. Prayer is instinctive. Prayer is normal. Prayer is screaming. Prayer is pleading. Prayer is crying. Prayer is yelling. Say I don’t know how to pray, do you know how to yell? Do you know how to be honest? Do you know how to have an honest assessment with where you really are? Now tell that to God.” – Judah Smith, Lead Pastor at City Church and Churchome

Prayer is sharing your desires, fears, hopes, frustrations, gratitude, doubts, and dreams. It’s asking God to help guide you and others through every aspect of life.

Prayer is the authentic conversation you choose to have.